Drowning With Your Eyes Open

Just so you know, I have not figured it out.  Life that is.  One minute I am cruising along and everything seems to be going in a positive direction and the next minute I am grobbling at the cross of Christ begging for forgiveness.  It’s this space in between that makes me the most tired.  Live 100 percent for Christ and you will weird folks out.  Live 100 percent for other people and you will find yourself with no mind of your own and very few friends.  Live 100 percent for yourself and you will never mature.  (self-centered living)  So where is the sweet spot?  How can a person know if they are living in it?  I would recommend Max Lucado’s Book of a similar title but I also want to expound a bit.  I have not found my sweet spot as they say.  I often thought it was going a hundred miles an hour with my hair on fire droppin’ wax(djing for the non-lingo folks)  and living the partying lifestyle.  I even thought that maybe if I worked at a religious vocation, that would be the end all-be all job.  Some people think that marriage or children will allow them to find that SPOT.  Sadly when our expectations come up short, we begin the blame game or worse, we shut down completely. 

I know that the Bible is clear on how a believer is to handle burdens and heaviness, but what about those who don’t believe?  I suppose that’s where my questions should begin in the first place.  If you are reading this and are not a believer in Jesus Christ as God’s Son and Savior of the world, my question to you is, how do you cope?  What kind of coping mechanism do you use?  Have you lived your whole life living on people’s advice or do you garner your self-worth from somewhere or someone else?  What does a well-lived and solid life look like?  Does it happen to have failures in it?  Is it without failures? 

I sometimes walk through my day like many of you.  Like a robot with nothing else to do but exist.  I look around and wonder if anyone else is drowning with their eyes open.  I often walk around with a life raft and since I am American and entitled, I refuse to share my life raft.  This is a travesty.  But I do it all the time!!  Often times, I consider myself a drowning survivor.  When a person has their eyes open and begin to drown, the body’s natural tendency is to REACT.  Funny….I don’t see all the drowners reacting to those with the rafts lately…

Maybe we should change our M.O.??

JZ

No Change Allowed

 

“It could be worse!” “The glass is always half empty.”  “Accept the way things are and just be content.”  “Don’t push the envelope.”  “Don’t rock the boat!”

Have you ever in your life heard any or all of these expressions?  I know I have.  And while I will admit, life has certainly been unfair in many ways to me; it has also given me unspeakable joy in the heartache of it all.  I find it rather difficult to beat down the giant of entitlement in my life at times.  As I am not a name it claim it type of believer and I certainly do not believe in complete wellness and health. (If God wanted us to live forever here, getting His hands dirty to create humans would seem irrelevant.)   In other words, I believe in the Almighty and that He created us with the intention of our human earthly bodies to erode and die. (Believe me this will happen.)  But I also wonder at times why all these “Other “ people are always using such lame expressions to try and keep me and the God of Israel in a perfectly fitted box..?

No.

No.

No.

Could be worse…Why couldn’t it be better?  The glass is always half empty…Why couldn’t my glass be overflowing?  Accept the way things are and just be content…really??  In other words stay the way you are and be happy with it.  Let me say it this way: Mediocrity is the only thing you should aim for because it’s easy and well it also takes care of rocking the boat and the envelope.  Just be plain. No expectations of God.  No change.  No danger.  I completely agree with the author who wrote the phrase, “Your God is too safe!”  I don’t know about anyone else, but somewhere along the way, someone convinced me and other Men of God to stop dreaming.  What a catastrophe!  Mediocre Christ following is fairly easy..I’ve DONE it!!  Look around you!!  Millions are doing it.  Just plain.  Now I am not asking anyone to become pompous in their devotion.  I simply get tired of folks always telling me to settle for what I have.  Settling..now there’s a funny word.  Funny only because you ONLY get what you settle for.

Me…I’m tired of settling.  If our mission as Christians is to be a blessing, then I suppose just being plain is no longer going to cut it.  Plain Christ following…How’s that working for you?

JZ

What Can Make Me Whole Again?

One of the dearest families we know from TN lost their son this weekend…..

Dear Little Family,

We love and hurt with you today.  Our prayers are with you.  There are no words….

Our sympathies,

The Zaragoza Family

Jesus carries your sorrows and your grief He has known.  His love for you has no limits.  He wants to call you His own..

Continue reaching out Steve.  We love you!

I’m Not Who I Was

Now that I have your attention:

I have gone through quite a bit in the last 10 years.  And for your sake, I am not about to go down memory lane in hopes that I kick up some sympathy from the public at large.  But I do want to set the record straight tonight.  I am a human being.(really Jason??..really??)  Yes and it is this minor fact in the universe that puts me in the same group of sinners like Adam & Eve, Judas the betrayer and the prostitute down on 10th.  Yes I am someone who has danced with the devil and done things I completely regret, but..

I am not who I was.

I have partied til my liver went floating.  I have ended up in a football stadium in just my boxers (thanks friends).  I have walked dark paths down to the pit and for some miracle of a reason am still living.  I have been stabbed in the back (and the front) and have also been the stabber.   I have fallen short of God’s best so many times that His average for me seemed good enough. But…

I am not who I was.

I used to play “Jesus Freak” on the radio to thousands of young people who held onto the hope they would hear artists sing about and then walk through my week higher than a kite.  I believed all Christians were who they told me they were and then found out it was a farce or dance really.  My heart was at one time so callous I thought ending my journey would be the easiest way out.  I hurt those that are closest to me..and often still do. But..

I’m not who I was.

I once thought I would be the one who God used to change the world.  I once thought I was going to be the greatest youth minister youth would ever know.  I at one time completely believed I was going to be the next Billy Graham.  I was going to be the house DJ that took Jesus to the gay community and reach out to those with AIDS and those deeply bigoted against the carriers of that disease.  I used to live in the bubble of the Jesus subculture. But..

I’m not who I was.

I pray that your 2010 will be a year when you realize that the Way the Truth and the Life can still only be found in Jesus Christ.  I hope you don’t have to take the long way around to learn the hard lessons that I have.  I hope when the people from your past continue to remind you of your loser status and continue to offer you sin in the form of drinking, drugs and sex that you will be strong and courageous and remember Jesus in the Garden praying for you. You alone.  Remember that He’ll be back for us.  YES He WILL!  Make 2010 the year that Jesus is King.  King of your life, your church (yes your church), your mind and king of your heart.  I am still one beggar looking for crumbs at the Kings table.  I used to be a bit more subdued and quiet and politically correct and conservative because everyone in my part of the country seems to be conservative.  I used to walk around with a small jesus and a small god. But..

I AM NOT WHO I WAS!

“Separated I cut myself clean
From a past that comes back in my darkest of dreams
Been apprehended by a spiritual force
And a grace that replaced all the me I’ve divorced.” -Jesus Freak-DC Talk

Coming Back to the Truth

There are things in this world (and out of this world for that matter) that battle against me and my spirit.  Sometimes the news of this world is too overwhelming..all I can do.

There is a constant battle for my mind and my thoughts and the idea that I must take each one of them captive makes me very very tired. …all I can do.

I am sometimes too harsh with my words.  The way that I say things to my wife and my children and I am on my knees in guilt and sometimes confusion. ..all I can do.

My heart is overwhelmed by the sorrow of this place called earth.  The death of innocent children and people.  The broken-hearted mothers and fathers of fallen soldiers…all I can do.

Strickened by the news of a close friend dead from cancer and the lives that disease has stolen from us…All I can do.

Crystal- I love you and am blown away by you every moment I get to spend with you.  Life sure is funny isn’t it?…all I can do.

Jonah and Lyla (my children)  Daddy is a screw up, but a rescued screw up and there is a Savior who loves you more than there are stars in the Heavens..all I can do.

If you made it through the song..just know that I understand that it is a very eighties tune..Just know that the song has been updated (in my opinion!) and now sounds like this!!!:

Christ is still in the business of hearing from YOU.

JZ

A Letter To Steven Curtis Chapman

(I am completely aware of my ineptness as a writer and also just as aware that Steven will probably never see this.)

Dear Steven,

I had a friend that introduced me to your music right around the time of More to This Life. I can’t honestly say that I became an instant fan. (I was one of those into bands such as Whiteheart, Stryper, Degarmo & Key, Whitecross, etc.)  Back then I would throw your cassette into my player and almost have to make sure none of my friends were around to hear me listening to “country” or “Kentucky Bluegrass Rock”.  I would eventually get over the ridicule and along the way, be quite amazed at the power of your lyrics. (I have never quite gotten over my love for 80’s Christian Rock/Metal.)  I remember seeing you in concert in good ol’ Shawnee, Oklahoma.  It was just you and your guitar and maybe a track or two.  I seem to recall songs like Dyin’ to Live, Tuesday’s Child and  a few others.  You won’t remember, but I ate at a table next to yours at a restaurant called Harry Bears (home of the upside down shake) after the gig at OBU.  At the time, I was working for a little radio station in OKC(KOKF) and was somewhat familiar with your music…but still not really a fan.

Being that time is something none of us can borrow, In between the years of 1987 to today, I have seen you in concert more times than I have fingers and our paths have crossed a time or two. (you may not remember the guy in a bookstore in OKC who was wearing a Mickey Mouse Ears hat from Disneyland who asked you a question regarding the movie The Apostle.)  I also had you record spots for my show over the telephone and had you sing Happy Birthday to a friend of mine. (had I remembered some copyright laws connected to that little song, I probably would have never asked )  So to say I know you would not be the truth.  Rather, I know your music and I know your Savior.

I knew guys with Mullets like yours.  I knew guys who would try their best to sing with a voice like yours.  I knew girls who wanted guys to sing songs like yours. I wanted to write songs like yours!  It wasn’t until I met a God like yours that I became a fan.  You recorded so many songs of rescue and redemption.  The one that continues to stick with me to this day is My Redeemer is Faithful and True.  While I know that it was on your first album and it probably proves my age, this song STILL gets into my spirit and keeps me wondering why Jesus rescued a guy as wretched and dark as me.  (but this letter isn’t about me.)  I am not sharing anything with you that you don’t already know when I say that your music shaped and changed my generation.  (and those after)

I received a phone call from a friend in Franklin, TN on that day a year and a half ago.  Like many, I was shocked, filled with sadness and much heartbreak.  I honestly remember thinking many days later, “I wonder if he will keep singing?”  I will have had my first baby girl in March of 2009. (Lyla) There are moments friend, when I will hear one of your songs and the tears will just begin to roll off my face.  The funny thing is, it has never been that when I hear your Cinderella song or even today when I heard your newest song, Heaven is the Face.  But even as I sit here to write, I am thinking of the lyrics to My Redeemer is Faithful and True and it is this song that causes me to well up with tears for you and your family.  Yes, because I am sad for you,  Yes, because it is such a tremendous and unfathomable loss.  Yes, because it is too much for a human to endure. But I think the tears are more than that.

I believe you know better than most how faithful and true the God of this Universe (and all others) truly is!  I believe you know what real pain and real heartache looks, feels and tastes like.  In the CCM article I recently read you said, “In this life, you’re going to grieve, but what does it look like to grieve with hope?”  Paul and Silas and you.  That’s what it looks like.

Thank you for using your gift.  Thanks for the memories and the mullet.  Thanks for showing me what it means to be a true fan. (of the King of all Kings)

JZ

p.s.  I truly believe there are thousands and thousands of fans who are grieving with hope. 

Rescue..My Story

2 Corinthians 4:8
We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair

Sometimes in this life we have a tendency to forget.  I forget my keys all the time!  If you aren’t wearing a name tag these days, it is most likely that I will forget who you are!! (trust me, it’s my age.)  I will go to the  grocery store and get all the way inside and start looking for the item I want to buy only to realize that I can’t  remember wat it is I came to consume. (was it deodorant or Cheez-its??)  Now before you write me off as a geriatric basket case at 30-something, I am by nature (and personality) a pretty forgetful person. (I suffer from the world’s shortest attention span..I swear!!)  But the harsh reality is that sometimes we all forget things, people, places and/or events.  It isn’t done intentionally most of the time.  It just happens.  Life moves pretty fast (as Ferris Bueller once said in his bathrobe) and well while life happens, we tend to forget.  (Have I made a point yet or what??!)

Even as a follower of Christ, I often times get so busy doing and going and planning and working that the vibe I give off is one of hurriedness, self-centeredness and apathy.(again, something tough to admit..but hey it happens.)  I am just as guilty for making my self “about” Kingdom work that I leave my story in the dust.  Story in the dust??  Jason what in the world do you mean??  I above all else am very aware of my inability to completely defeat sin while here on this planet, but it is a catastrophe of sorts to forget your story.  Lots of “churchy” folks may use words like “saved” or “sanctified” or even use the phrase “I came to Jesus!”  I have sung many refrains of Saved! Saved! Saved! at church camp when I was a kid. 

The story.  It wasn’t until I completely rebelled and ran with top speed from all things churchly, religious, and God Himself, that I realized that only HE can rescue a soul.  If you knew me in college and watched from the outside, then you know that I was a non-representation of what true Christianity is/was back then. (sometimes I even struggle with the representation I give of the Savior today.)  It wasn’t that I hated God.(that is a strong word:hate)  I just didn’t want to be associated with the church ties, starched shirts, the “nice” guy stigma, the idea that Christians are somewhat filled with bigotry and selective friendships. (love is for all.)  I was just burned out on “Jesus people”.

This painting hangs over my fireplace  as a reminder that I have since been rescued from my rebellion, my apathy, callousness, and most of all from myself.  When the storms come and the waves seem to over-take me, I remember that I can still (yes even at the end of 2009 and into the future!) cling to the old rugged cross.  When I begin to put my faith in people a bit too much, I remember the cross.  When I remember those who held the banner of Christ up in my life(CRBC), I think of the cross.  When I get upset at the way other Christians treat gays, the sick, AIDS stricken, and simply different people, I cling to the cross.  When I catch a glimpse of my life and what it may have become without rescue, I am humbled by these two pieces of wood and the three nails it took to pull me out of darkness. 

When I do grow old and become quite forgetful, I will always have this painting to remind me of the grace of a King that would have stepped out of Heaven to rescue me alone.  The great news is, He stepped out for us all…

Have you forgotten what it feels like to be rescued?  It may take a minute for you to realize you need rescuing and that is fine.  But eventually your arms will give out, you may run out of tears.  You will come to the end of your rope…The cross will be there..and believe it or not..the ground there is still level.

Still a beggar,

JZ

 

At Peace Now

It is not that you have got God but that He has got you—My Utmost For His Highest

Sometimes I think way too much.  At one point in my life, I believed God had called me into youth ministry later to find out that it was no calling at all.  I once believed God had called me to missions later to find out it was no calling.  I once felt called by God to become an evangelist later to find out it cost thousands of dollars just to “complete” the call.  In each circumstance at the back-end, I felt more confused and extremely disappointed. In myself, in the institution of “Christianity” , the church and myself.  I became and still am  so self-centered that I forgot how to walk and not faint.  I forgot that God craves my love rather than my sacrifice.  My obedience rather than my crafty(ed) words.

In all my chasing down of a dream I thought God brought to me or “gave” me, I missed one really important thing:  I chose to be a worker of God and had no Idea that in a real physical, emotional and spiritual sense, I was choosing my own way not His.  Ministry to the human race is miserable when you choose and do it your way rather than God’s.  And while I have seen God do some really cool stuff through my words and intentions while “in” ministry, I still cannot begin to communicate to you that I was miserable. 

Being in ministry anywhere is no picnic. (if you have only served in the American church, than you may have a warped idea of what true ministry looks like.) I have been guilted, made to feel less knowledgeable, inadequate, and unimportant by Christians in ministry than those who are not.  While I know this isn’t and won’t be everyone’s experience, I simply mention this to let you know that I always seemed to want to be somewhere else while in the ministry.  That was a shortcoming in my discipleship to my Savior.  I wanted to be taken up with one cause, one purpose and that was Christ crucified.  Unfortunately the hearts of men are weak at best.

I am more content these days than I have ever been.  I am sure that allowing the God of all universe’s to have His way with me has been the key to my joy.  I don’t know where you are today spiritually, but if you are in the ministry of the King, please let Him have his way with you.  Don’t allow man to dictate the death and resurrection of your Savior in a fashion that causes you to be a puppet in the hands of a human.  Be a messy clump of clay in the master’s hands instead.   Make Christ’s amazing grace and blood be a your matter.  All your heart, mind and soul…that’s what He wants.  He has you..to believe you can grasp God is not so brilliant as the thought of Him grasping YOU.

Peace,

JZ

“I am made all things to all men, that I might by all means save some” (1Cor. 9:22).-Holman Christian Standard Bible

 

Facebooking God

There certainly is nothing new under the Sun.  But technology sure has made life better hasn’t it?  I mean cell phones, computers, laptops, the internet, hands free cells, entertainment, HDTV, Satellite tv/radio, etc etc… Life sure is better thanks to technology! Communicating with another human being has never been so easy.  You might even argue that the rate at which we communicate with each other has improved, gotten faster, and has taken on a “whole” world mantra all its own.   Yes the world is communicating faster.  That communication is reaching further and technology has made communication between human beings better….wait …scratch that last comment.

If you were to type a name into the search field on Facebook, two things are bound to happen.  1)  You will find the person you’re looking for or 2)  You won’t find the person you’re looking for but rather everyone else on earth with the same name!  Aren’t these social utilities wonderful?  It seems to be a lot easier to stand for something when you hide behind a monitor and a keyboard!(but that is for another blog)

What would happen if you treated God like He was your FB friend?  Would you friend Him?  Could he read your wall and see holiness or a resemblance of His Son?  Would you even consider allowing God to see your profile?  What if FB was your new Mission field or assignment?  Do you communicate more often and with more people now with FB than you did say 10 years ago?  When is last time you sat down with a REAL friend and simply talked?(yes, out loud and face to face)  Are we truly better communicators than we used to be?  I have a FB available to me in so many ways!  As a matter of fact, I own more than 12 FB’s!:  FAITH BOOKS!! (Bible)  And although you would think with so many available, I would have God at the top of my Friends List.  I don’t and He is not. 

Something has seriously gotten lost in the desperate attempt to have the best technology NOW and being able to access huge amounts of information from anywhere the WWW will allow us to go.  So what is it?  Why is it hard to be nice to all people?  Why is it that we have mountains of technology and all of its advances and yet we are (it seems) all alone or desperate to not be alone??  Have you taken a stand for or against something out in public and not in the sidebar/menu of a social networking site? 

One day soon we are all going to have to bow to the King.  We are going to have to answer for the relationship with Him.  We won’t be able to tag him in a photo, or simply add Him to our List.  He doesn’t Chat or play Farmtown!  He is the King of Kings and He is worthy of our praise.  He wants to hear from you.  On your knees. In prayer.  He has a love for you that is humanly unfathomable.

Communication.  Most everyone thinks they are great at it.  I know I thought I was for a long time.  Truth is, I am mediocre at best.  I love technology(ok Kip..DANG!).  But it amazes me how we have shut ourselves off from one another in this country.  Maybe I live in a bubble , but it seems to me we have all these wonderful tools and yet we seem to be the most depressed, stressed, lonely, angry, broke (lacking money), morally deficient people in the history of our country’s existence.  Am I wrong?  Am I hitting a button here?

So Facebook me with some great comments or your own take on these questions.  I would love to hear from you.  I am one who believes God was there at the Beginning(he IS.)  and He has seen the End.(He IS.)  I am not real sure God stresses out about blogs or FB or MySpace or Twitter, but I do know one thing:  If you want to talk to Him and you desperately need to hear from Him..you cannot send Him an IM.  Your going to have to get your knees dirty and you may end up having to listen more than you talk.  God owns the cattle on a thousand hills!..SHOOT He OWNS the Hills!(as my friend Dave Ramsey has once said!)

All this technology…are you still lonely?  Are the only friends you have on social utilities?  Are you trying hard to fill a hole that seems unfillable?  Grab the original FB and give it a try.  I hear the book of John is a good starting point.  If you happen to be someone with no faith in God or any other religion, I simply challenge you to read the Bible from cover to cover as a History book and give me some feedback.

I gotta run, my land line is ringing!!

JZ

Theologically Baffled by a Five Year Old

Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life.[1] Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live.-John 11:25

A cold front moved into our neck of the woods last night and it was down right cold in our house this morning.  I was the first one up. (That’s not to say that I was fully awake.)  The chill was the first thing I noticed as I roamed around the living room aimlessly to try and find a light to turn on.BURRR!!  I get to be the proud father of two wonderful children and my oldest is the next one up and at ‘em.  Before he can even become fully aware of his surroundings, he has let me know in no uncertain terms, that he would like two waffles cut up with syrup!  Mmmm…breakfast when you were a kid was simply the best was it not??

After getting my son ready for the day and getting myself ready, (I know, it’s weird putting on a suit everyday after being a radio DJ for half my life.)  we head downstairs to get our “waffle ON!”  In the process of going from my son’s room to the kitchen table, he asks me, “daddy, how come some people believe that Jesus is real and others don’t?”  Put one on the board for my Ultra-theologically enhanced super questioning son!!  With so many options to choose and different paths to go down, this question had daddy baffled.  How do you explain that some people don’t believe in breathing (and yet live) while others breath the breath of life??  How will a five year old understand the reality of Christ in a life and the unbelief that He exists in others?  How does daddy explain it without sounding like Puff the Magic Dragon??  Will daddy’s theology be wrong? (Daddy believes that only God /Jesus can call people to Himself period. If He doesn’t, then your faith is not genuine but rather contrived.)

I hear my daughter crying upstairs (she has been ill for a while now.)  so I rush to her crib, but before I can get there, Mommy has met me on the stairs and asks me to take little one downstairs and feed her.  YES!!(say it like Napoleon Dynamite)  I let my son know that I haven’t forgot about his question (this buys me more time!) and that I am going to change sister’s diaper and feed her and then we can get back to this deep discussion.(talk)  Sister’s fed and changed and now the time has come:  time to instill some great biblical-theologically deep truth to my son.(you should hear great classical music in the background)  You can’t really say to a five-year old that people who believe Jesus is real are the one’s who have experienced Him first-hand.  You certainly can’t expect a five-year old to understand “God’s Elect” or “Security of the believer”..can you? 

I simply tell my son that lots of people believe Jesus is/was real.  I proceed to tell him that some people like just plain waffles and others enjoy them with syrup. 

As always, conversations with my children tend to get me thinking and well this moment was a bit more reflective than most.  I have heard it said (very generically) that I may be the only Jesus people see.  While that sounds good and could possibly be true, I would hope that what they see is not as important as what they experience, learn and apply to their spirit after spending time with me.  I suppose lots of people believe that Jesus lived and breathed.  It’s allowing Him into your heart that takes you beyond simply existing.

 Son,

We(our family) believe that Jesus is real and we are praying that one day when He is lifted up in your life, He will draw you to Himself.  Then, not only will He be physically real to you, but He will be reality as well.  Don’t believe everything you hear coming from a preacher or prophet or from behind a pulpit.  To love God is to love His word.  That is where your answers can be found.  Do not let men twist your words or lead you to believe theirs.  Truth is found in only one place.  My hope as your dad is that you won’t simply settle for waffles.  Add the syrup..it’s the good stuff!!

It will be interesting when my children begin asking about Holiness..I often wonder if they will see holiness in their world..in their lifetimes..true holiness…I suppose I have my work cut out for me.

JZ

Spot Remover

“He’s not a good wooden person!”-pg15

Bed-time stories can certainly be eye-opening.  98% of the time, Jonah gets to pick out what we read so tonight it is the same.  This time around he chooses You Are Special by Max Lucado.  And while I used to be a huge fan of Max’s, I have  moved on.  This particular book reminded me that I seem to have accumulated so many spots in the last 12 years that it is sometimes hard to see the creativeness, personality and gumption that the wood-carver created in me.  (Nothing like a children’s book to humble, humiliate and remind you of your spiritual ineptness!)  This was somewhat of a painful experience. 

The book’s premise is a great one.  Don’t allow the world to tell you who or what you are.  This is a great encouraging way for little ones to learn to trust God for their self-worth.  Somewhere along the journey I think we allow ourselves to grow up and shut down our ability to love as a child.  While it is no picnic to be around a grown adult acting childish, it is a whole other realm to love like a child.  Whole-heartedly.  Unafraid.  No sense of being lied to or abandoned.  Safe.  Full of courage.

Wow..it seems I have a lot of time to make up for with the wood carver.  So many dots.  Not enough stars.  And constantly using the wrong measuring stick.  Yes, my compass on this journey has always worked.  It is I who hasn’t always follwed it.  I chose a different route at times, sought temporary pleasure to try and fill an eternal hole.  Many have placed their dots on me.  Some  a few stars.  My wood is damaged and sometimes I have believed the others around me.  I need some time with my maker. 

Looking at my son and wondering where he may draw his self worth from in the course of a day, it felt good to be reminded that what God thinks is still(after 30 something years) more important than anyone else.

I love you Jonah..Daddy.

I made you..God.

“Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”-1 Peter 3:4

Blue Letter Bible.  1996-2009. 5 Oct 2009

What You Are

 

“Do you know who I am?  Have you seen the things  I’ve Done?”- Third Day

Reflection is a necessity for the Christ Follower don’t you think?  Sometimes it pains me to have to look back and see that dark stain of a man back there where I left him.  But every once in a while I will hear a song on the radio or read something or a friend will say something that takes me back to that sinister place.  Now I am not advocating that you should always re-visit the old you.  If you can help it and with God’s power, please feel free to never go back there.  But often times I am briefly reminded that it simply had to be the blood of Christ that could only rescue me.  You see, without His blood, Christianity is a farce, a joke, a flash in the pan, a feeling, a crutch, a snow job!

But it was the blood.  Yes my friends..it was His blood that set you and me free.  Every once in a while you should remember that as a source of hope and strength.  My doctor claims I have too much blood and that it is a very thick blood.  But he knows that the only power my blood has goes only as far as this human body or another.  Jesus’ blood has the supernatural power to give eternal life and resurrection from all things dead.  Wow. 

“what can wash away my sin?  Nothing but the Blood of Jesus!  What can make me whole again?  Nothing but the blood of Jesus!”This is all my hope and peace, Nothing but the blood of Jesus; This is all my righteousness,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.”-Robert Lowry

Jesus has seen what I  have done.  He KNOWS who I am.  Those scars through his hands..those are my nails..JZ

“ But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ.”-Ephesians 2:13

The Holy Bible, English Standard Version copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

How I “Get Down”

“To live your life you’ve got to lose it and all the losers get a crown”

-Audio Adrenaline

I don’t know about you but I tend to watch a lot(a LOT) of news.  Good news, bad news, mediocre news, right news, wrong news, no news is good news with Gary Ganoo(z) (Holla Great Space Coaster fans!!!).

You get the point.  I am constantly looking for the latest and most updated headlines.  As of late, I have tried to expand my scope to reach further around the world and engage myself in headlines from countless other countries.(surprising how little the rest of the world reports on us “important” Americans.)  But I love news!  So like a lot of other people who are drawn to a good story, I tend to walk away quite disappointed, heart-broken, mad, upset, peeved and considering where I live, I always get miffed at how unbalanced the local forecasts are.  Bring on Tuesday morning!!

So I wake up this morning at 4am!(I know..CRAZY with a capital C!)  But I simply cannot sleep.  SO I take this opportunity to jump into God’s word.  I tend to believe if you wake up that early, it’s gotta be because the Lord has something that is very important that He wants to share!!  I turn to Matthew Chapter 6(been here for a while now) and simply read and re-read the Model Prayer.  Some folks(and Bible Scholars) refer to it as the Lord’s Prayer and I suppose it is that too.  But here it is..the Model Prayer..pretty old school, well known, pretty well memorized by all Christians, Daily Bread and yadda yadda yadda…WAIT A MINUTE!!..

Thy Kingdom Come.

Wars, rumors of war, unrest in Israel, Iran possibly going to war with Israel, Economic devastation in the USA, Floods, Hurricanes, Fires in California, brokeness, darkness, gay rights, no rights, Muslim rights, Christian rights, yo momma’s rights!!(and I didn’t even mention the unbelievable fear of Christians!) ….STOP!  News.  All found in the NEWS…Thy Kingdom Come.

Do you ever get a glimpse of the darkest part of humanity when you watch the news or people’s reactions?  Do you often wonder why so many people are short tempered(or why television seems to be spotlighting it all of the sudden)??  It goes without question that it is easier than ever before in the history of the world for a person to get completely DOWN.

Have you lost your life?  I can pretend all day long that I walk around sacraficially and am totally 100% aware of the needs of every single person around me 24/7, but we know(I KNOW) that is not the truth at all.  Have you lost yourself in Jesus?  How about in His Kingdom work?  Do we truly know what it means to lose our lives for His sake?  I am not a gambling man, but my money is on …NO.  Maybe that is why in the middle of this Model Prayer, Jesus brings up the fact that we must ask to be delivered from evil on a momentary basis.  WOW.  Do you ever wonder what “Thy Kingdom Come looks like?..I do.

Maybe it looks like Huge beautiful buildings and perfect people getting along with everyone in perfect peace and Harmony.  Maybe it is Jesus comforting us because we were so battered and bruised by real life on earth.  OR..Maybe it is a bunch of losers with crowns too heavy to lift and hope too huge to crush!

He lifts me up,

JZ

 

Daughters

Dear Lyla-

You smile every time I walk into the room. Your innocence makes me jealous but proud. So many people around us are worried, stressed, concerned about the bank account. Your eyes pierce me to the soul. As if to say, “Daddy I believe in YOU!” And at the same time, your tiny heart beat brings me such incredible joy! You might think I am jealous of your big brother as well for being able to make you laugh out loud better than I can. I am not. When you two “characters” laugh, my heart jumps inside of me. Don’t ever stop doing that…laughing. The greatest part about children’s laughter is that is not a worldly laughter (that I know of) but rather a pure joyous laughter given intrinsically to them from their Maker.

I am a self-proclaimed comedian by my own admission. I love watching Thursday night comedy on NBC (most of the time). I love the genius of a perfectly delivered punch-line and I LOVE to laugh!! I simply don’t do it enough. As I think about what I find funny, it occurred to me that those shows and/or comedians cannot provide the kind of laughter that God gives to a child. It just isn’t of the same caliber at all!

So Lyla, when you are trusting daddy to carry you and love on you and be a God-daddy, just remember that your laughter blesses me in every way. Oh yeah ..and Big Brother..you too!!

I found this photo of my daughter on my desktop this morning and I simply cannot get past her eyes. That look of wonderment!! The hope of Trust she seems to be asking her daddy for. May I always be mindful of the integrity I walk in now so that you will walk in the same shadow.

Love,

Daddy

Proverbs 20:7
The righteous who walk in his integrity— blessed are his children after him!

Scars

They are ugly.  They are reminders of pain.  I have quite a few.  Injuries, eye-surgeries, and most of them are a result of my own stupidity.  Rarely have I ever taken the time to ponder the amount of scarring on the most important organ in my body: The heart

I am no doctor and as such, I have never physically opened up my chest cavity and explored my heart and it’s arteries. (it would be kind of creepy..)  But because I have such a conviction that God is Love and He cannot act against his character or act in a way that would make Him less than He is, I DO understand that many a believer’s heart is covered with the scars of our pasts as well as the possible present.

God’s love for the Christian drives us to obey His commands.  That word command is a real cruddy word to most people.  I mean c’mon, how many wives like to be given commands by their husbands and vice versa? (the world would not seem to tolerate such language/actions.)  So what do commands of God have to do with the scarring of the heart?  EVERYTHING..

Think about the times you deliberately disobeyed the Lord or intentionally broke a command..We’re not talking about fundamentalism here, but rather an intentional flip-and-finger to the Lord.  (Adultery, idolatry, disobeying of parents, lying, etc)  Maybe you haven’t sinned in your entire life.  If that is the case, then you are a newborn and can’t read this blog anyway. (the reality is none of us are born sinless..but that is for another blog post)  Thinking about it?  We have all been there.  The Bible says that we all have! 

So what scars are holding you back?  Are you letting them keep you in bondage and memory to the sin that caused them?  Scars..man some of them are putrid aren’t they?  Suppose you are a mother of an infant and that infant is in a severe traumatizing car accident.  From the surgeries performed, your baby is scarred from the top of their head to the bottom of their back and have one giant scar diagonally across the face and head..are you imagining??  Now imagine they go to Kindergarten for the first time and another child calls them ugly or monster or GROSS!

Love is why God’s commands are in place for the believer.  The Bible is very clear to this. (although I still whence in fear of fundamentalism creeping in.)  Again, God cannot go against his nature.  Everything He does is out of a love that humans simply cannot comprehend.  It is not the command itself that becomes ritualistic and a chore, but the intent of our scarred hearts that turn us into robots when we hear the word command.  Scars of the heart are a result of disobeying a command of God or the obeying of a command out of fundamentalism.  The cool thing about the way God created humans is that we have the uncanny ability to heal. (scar up!)  Healing through pain..wow there’s a concept.

Still thinking about your infant child?..Now place them in front of the Cross and compare the scars.  Praise Jesus!

JZ

John 20:27
Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here, and see my hands; and put out your hand, and place it in my side. Do not disbelieve, but believe.”

The Holy Bible, English Standard Version copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.